About three years ago I had to sell my house. I was unable to afford it anymore and I really had to live with my family. I really loved my house. I was able to see it being built which meant that everything in it was my choice. I think about my old house all the time. It was my house, everything in it I owned and loved. I have a love of the colour green so I found some lovely wallpaper which had green patterns and I decorated some of the rooms. I remember after painting all my kitchen dinner green that it was too much green so I painted it all again in white. When I think back I am not sure how I did it all on my own. My Mum is great at wallpapering so she helped me with this. I also had some wonderful green wallpaper in my living room, along with some green curtains at the windows. Upstairs I also had some lovely wallpaper in my bedrooms. My spare bedroom had some lovely bird wallpaper which my niece loved. She would also say that she was staying at Auntie’s in the bird room. When I moved in I had a blank canvas. I was able to create a home that was mine from the beginning. I remember my first day there and walking around the house and feeling that this is all mine. I also had a wonderful garden outside. My Mum is a great gardener and she created a great garden. I would love this time of year when the plants would wake up and my gardent would come to life. At the end of the garden I had a vegetable patch and every year I would grow bean, peas, potatoes, pumpkins and other vegetables. Home grown veg is the best. We spent so much time and money making it perfect, I was very lucky to own such a wonderful house that was just my own. The place that I have so many memories in. I have spent so much time just imagining that I was in my beautiful house again. In my kitchen making a cup of tea, hula hooping in my living room or planting bulbs in my garden. I have been told that I really shouldn’t do it but it has been so hard not too and I thought I always would. Last week I looked at a well known house selling website. I hadn’t bothered to look for a while as I am not looking for a house at the moment. My old house was on it. It was hard to recognise at first as everything in the house that made it mine was gone. All my lovely wallpaper was gone and replaced with plain walls. It didn’t look horrible, just different. I understand that all people don’t like the colour green. The worst thing about it is the garden. Every single plant was gone, all the colour was gone all the time and money spent was just thrown away. I used to look forward to the spring as in the front there were yellow flowers that gave wonderful colour but all these have been removed and replaced with stones. To make even worse the fence is painted a horrible blue. There is a lot of fence and it looks awful. Despite it being awful, I am glad that I have seen all the changes to the house. It has enabled me to let go. It is not my beautiful house anymore, it is just someone else’s house now.
Published by A Recovering Brain
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