It is quite weird but I feel like a year of my life is just missing. I guess this is just part of the recovery period for a brain injury. When I was first ill I just didn’t know what was going on. I didn’t understand what had happened to me. Even now I am still finding out what happened and why. I had a heart attack that caused me to have a cardiac arrest. There is nothing wrong with my heart, I had a SCAD heart attack which is quite rare. I know 2018 happened but it just feel like someone else was living my life this year. My life was quite boring and 2018 was definitely not boring. I can remember what happened in 2018 and did many things, good and bad. I feel detached from my life then, I wasn’t really in control of it. I guess I need to take back control. It is hard to really explain but I guess I could use a football metaphor. I was on the sidelines and now I want to get back on the field.

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