What is wrong with me?

I have been in and out of the hospital over the last couple of weeks and it has brought back memories of when I was in hospital 18 months ago. I can’t remember all the bad bits that happened but when something happened I wondered if it was the same. I remember waking up in a hospital room wondering why I was there. What is wrong with me I would say all the time. I had been in hospital many times before and something would hurt but 18 months ago, nothing hurt and when I asked what was wrong with me they said I had a heart attack, a cardiac arrest. I didn’t understand and would just laugh as it sounded ridculous and it was ridculous. Now that I realise how bad it was for me, I was so scared to go into hospital. I was scared when I was in there and scared when I came out. I guess my body showed be this time that something was definitely wrong with me and it was so painful. I makes up I guess for it being painless 18 months ago. I guess it is good that I don’t remember as I guess a heart attack is really painful, I don’t remember.