Driving me crazy

Well yesterday was a big day for me. For the last two and half years I haven’t been unable to drive. When I was first unwell I suffered some seizures so that ruled me out of driving for a year. I always thought that when the year passed I would be ready but I quickly realised that it would not be so easy. I knew I wasn’t ready so I didn’t worry about it too much. I am able to get around quite well on the bus and I have even stopped moaning about it all the time as I this it makes people annoyed. In the summer last year I started thinking about it again. My driving license has been suspended by the DVLA and it is up to them to make all the investigations, contact all my different doctors and get medical reports from them. It has taken a really long time and finally at the end of last year they were finally ready to find out if I was able to drive. I booked an assessment which I had yesterday. I was really anxious about it but not that I wouldn’t pass, I seemed to be anxious about passing the assessment and being told that I could drive again. It seemed strange to feel like this as I really want to get it back into driving as it will give me some much more independence. When I talked about my worries about the assessment, several people said to me that even though I may be told I am OK now, and can drive again, it doesn’t mean that I have to. I worried that a letter would arrive from the DVLA with my driving licence in it and that everyone would think there is no reason not to drive. Anyway, I had the assessment and it was OK. It was terrible weather, raining and pretty dark. Not ideal conditions. I have been told that I am not ready yet to get my driving license back. I am not disappointed as I have said, I don’t think I am ready yet. I have to take some lessons and then go for a reassessment. I am looking at it as positive, I am moving forward. My brain is recovering still and it just isn’t there yet.