Someone said to me a while ago, ‘your’e alive!’. It was a nice thing to say to me but it is a real simplistic way to look at things now. I guess a couple of years ago when I was at my worse this was the best thing to say to me. I mean it is a lot better to be alive than dead but normally you just don’t really think about this. You don’t realise how amazing it is to wake up every morning and just do normal things. A couple of days ago I went to an aqua park with my family. This is something that I haven’t done for years, if ever, so I was bit worried about it but I thought to myself don’t put it off as I may not get a chance to do it again. I think this a lot nowadays, trying out new things everyday. I think I have a dread in my head that I have to do it all now as I just don’t know when my time will be up. The other day when I was at the aqua park I decided to try the large slide that circled to building. Well after the first time you couldn’t stop me and I must have gone down about twenty times. When I went down I started saying to myself ‘I’m alive!’. It’s a bit sad I know but I couldn’t stop doing it. It felt good to say it, it made me happy. The day after I felt very alive as my whole body hurt so much so I probably it again. Despite the pain it’s good to be alive.
Published by A Recovering Brain
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