For the first year after everything happened I just thought that after time I would get back to normal. My brain was recovering, it would take some time but it would get better. It wasn’t until after about a year that I realised that a brain injury is permanent and you just have to adjust your life to live with one. When I asked a professional about it they said that when they first saw me I was at 10% and then I was 60% which was amazing. I said I wanted to be at 100% and they laughed, but not in a bad way but it hit me quite hard. I realised that it wasn’t possible. The thing is that I still want to be 100% and I don’t think this is a bad way to think. Every night I spend time on my brain training apps and working slowly through my maths books. I think to myself when doing this, before I wasn’t bothered about maths skills that I had lost from school but I have spent many nights getting annoyed as I can’t work out a factor of a number. I don’t need this knowledge but when I work it out is does feel good. I guess I have too much time on my hands, I have been told I need to write my Carpe Diem list and this will take up my time. Tonight I was thinking about the 60%, should I just be grateful that I have reached this far. I am sure I am even further now as it was over a year ago that I was told this. I don’t want to get back to the old normal as the new normal is better, I think. Is 100% possible, no I don’t think it is but I will work hard everyday just to see how close I can get.
Published by A Recovering Brain
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